I've been obsessing lately.  I hate it.  My mind is completely preoccupied with the "what if."  I'm not sure what it all really means, but I know it's something I could do without.  ha

The kids are starting school on Monday.  Oh happy day.  Yes, that's really how I feel.  I think summer should only be two months long.  The last month is just too taxing on me, and the kids are so restless.

My religious beliefs have brought me to this point in my life; being the stay-at-home mom.  It's not a requirement of the LDS church, but it is encouraged for those that are able to do it.  I thought it was important, and I know the kids have loved being home with their mom.  But it has not been easy for me at all!  I quit my job and moved to Texas at the same time.  I attribute this change to my mental anxiety! :)  I love my boys, but I never knew how hard it would be.

I wish I could find complete joy in this way of life, but I've realized I need something more. Hence the change in careers.  Nursing will give me the escape, but also allow me to be there for them when they need me.  I want to be the mom they deserve, and I know that this will allow me to be better. Fingers crossed.